Denial

Four days to chemo. I picked up my prednisone today. I'm in Denial. I'm at the top of my game. I feel great. I've been at work the last two days, and will be there the next two (including Christmas Day). We even had a little house fire today and I felt fine, no shortness of breath, no weakness, no nausea, even while on air and hauling a hoseline and axe through the house. I've done difficult workouts today and yesterday. Today was 3 rounds for time of 50 x 75 lb. sumo deadlift high pulls and 30 x 75 lb. bench presses. Time was 26:03. I've been eating well too. I've not had any gluten or dairy in the last 3 days and haven't had any problems with that, no hunger, no dizziness. It's basically the Paleo Diet, i.e. I eat the way the cavemen ate.

All this adds up to living in denial. I'll be starting the drugs in 4 days. I'll feel like crap for a week or more. The cancer books say not to look at chemo as the enemy, but to remember that cancer is the opponent. Chemo is my ally. Chemo will save my life. But it's hard to keep that front and centre.